Writing is hard. Especially now because for the first time, I'm writing something that other people read. I've been writing for years, and most of the time, I'll create something, lose it, find it, then throw it away, being hard on myself for the quality of the writing and the overall messiness.
However, this time, I'm committed. I've put it out on display for people to read, I've invited and accepted feedback. This has been a great exercise for the most part, and to some degree, I will keep doing it. But, it occurs to me that it can also be a hindrance.
Being a people-pleaser, I want everyone that reads it to enjoy it. But you can't please everyone, which is a bummer. Even literary pop culture icons, like Harry Potter or The Hunger Games, are fraught with controversy. And, though I don't write to follow trends and I'm not trying to make international best sellers lists, it makes me happy when other people like the story I'm telling, it's what keeps me motivated to write the next page when the thrill of my own review wears off, as it inevitably does.
It's tricky for me to distinguish which is more important, writing for me or writing for you- my own version of 'what came first?' On one hand, I have to say that the writing for myself is more integral, because if I am excited about the writing, then your entertainment should come as a direct result. While if I am writing to please, I may never succeed, in which case, my internal motivation will suffer. However, without seeing other people enjoying it, I'm not as inspired to keep going, to find the answer to the question, 'what happens next?' It's a real conundrum.
I don't know if sharing the story at this early stage is wise, and without a mentor writer to ask, I will have to learn by trial and error. It's possible, however, that until I get farther along in the story and have made the structure strong enough, I risk the whole thing tumbling down as I attempt to make it perfect for every reader, an impossible task.
So, I'm unsure, should I put the story out there at these infant stages, or wait until it's more mature?